What You Do When No One Is Looking

Gryphen at Immoral Minority picked up this 2008 blog post. It’s a sweet story, and worth a look. WC’s Norwegian isn’t good enough to confirm the tale, but it appears to be authentic.

WC is waiting for a report that Rick Perry, Michelle Bachmann or Mitt Romney did something similar 20 years ago, when no one important was watching, just because they are fundamentally decent human beings.

The Craziest Person in the Room

WC has posted an intermittent series of blog entries on the Republican presidential wannabes. After posts on Mitt “Multiple Choice” Romney and Rick “Just Lynch ‘Em” Perry, it’s time to visit with the person who sometimes styles herself “Dr. Michelle Bachmann. Not many lawyers call themselves “Dr.” Rep. Bachmann does.

But instead of providing others’ views of this candidate, let alone WC’s own, we’ll let Ms. Bachman speak for herself.

‘Lady Liberty and Sarah Palin are lit by the same torch.”

–Rep. Michele Bachmann, in a recorded message for a campaign event hosted by Sarah Palin to support Alaska Senate candidate Joe Miller, Oct. 28, 2010

“The big thing we are working on now is the global warming hoax. It’s all voodoo, nonsense, hokum, a hoax.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, March 15, 2008

‘‘I’m very concerned about the international moves they’re making, particularly … moving the United States off the dollar and onto a global currency, like Russia and China are calling for.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, making false claims that the Obama administration was considering “abandoning the dollar for a multinational currency,” March 2009

‘‘It’s your state that fired the shot that was heard around the world! You are the state of Lexington and Concord, you started the battle for liberty right here in your backyard.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, muddling her American history while speaking in New Hampshire by mistakenly declaring it the birthplace of the American Revolution (the Battles of Lexington and Concord and the shot heard round the world took place in Massachusetts), March 12, 2011

‘‘But we also know that the very founders that wrote those documents worked tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States. … I think it is high time that we recognize the contribution of our forbearers who worked tirelessly — men like John Quincy Adams, who would not rest until slavery was extinguished in the country.’

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, speaking at an Iowan’s for Tax Relief event, Jan. 23, 2011 (The Founding Fathers did not work to end slavery, and John Quincy Adams was not one of the Founding Fathers)

”Before we get started, let’s all say ‘Happy Birthday’ to Elvis Presley today.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN), while campaigning for president in South Carolina on what was actually the anniversary of Elvis’s death, Aug. 16, 2011 (Elvis was born on January 8)

”The President of the United States will be taking a trip over to India that is expected to cost the taxpayers $200 million a day.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, grossly exaggerating the expense of Obama’s trip, which cost a fraction of that ($200 million is more than the entire war in Afghanistan costs per day), Nov. 3, 2010

‘‘We now have a total Gangster Government. They don’t even pretend anymore. It’s total in-your-face cronyism.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann on the government bailout of GM, June 2009

”I don’t know where they’re going to get all this money because we’re running out of rich people in this country.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, accusing the Obama administration of plotting to divert money from Republican to Democratic districts and planning to tax the wealthy to fund the windfalls, Feb. 2009

”This is an earthquake issue. This will change our state forever. Because the immediate consequence, if gay marriage goes through, is that K-12 little children will be forced to learn that homosexuality is normal, natural and perhaps they should try it.”

—Michele Bachmann, on gay marriage, March 2004

”There’s a commonality with the Mall of America, in that it’s on that proportion. There’s marble everywhere. The other thing I remarked about was there is water everywhere.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, likening visiting Iraq to visiting the Mall of America in Minneapolis, July 2007

”Unfortunately she is now suffering from breast cancer, so keep her in your prayers. This may be an opportunity for her now to be open to some spiritual things, now that she is suffering with that physical disease. She is a lesbian.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, suggesting that gay singer Melissa Etheridge should repent after getting cancer, Nov. 2004

”Carbon dioxide is natural, it is not harmful, it is a part of Earth’s lifecycle. And yet we’re being told that we have to reduce this natural substance, reduce the American standard of living, to create an arbitrary reduction in something that is naturally occurring in Earth.”

—Rep. Michele Bachmann, speech on the House floor, April 22, 2009

”I just take the Bible for what it is, I guess, and recognize that I am not a scientist, not trained to be a scientist. I’m not a deep thinker on all of this. I wish I was. I wish I was more knowledgeable, but I’m not a scientist.”

—Michele Bachmann, September 2003

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WC thinks we can all agree with the last one, Rep. Bachmann.