Are All These Christianists Pervs and Horny Dogs?


hastertIt seems to WC that the more noisy a politician is about his piety – and its seems to be all guys, ladies – the more likely that the noisy politician is involved in one or more sex scandals. Call it the Hypocrisy Hypothesis.

WC has commented on this inference before. But let’s examine some of the more recent evidence:

Alabama’s Governor Robert Bentley, who seems to have been elected because of his reputation as a churchgoing, squeaky-clean public official, is twisting in the wind of a sex scandal involving Rebekah C. Mason, the governor’s senior political adviser. Or former senior political advisor. She quit suddenly when the scandal broke.

And several media sources – admittedly, not the most reliable media – have reported that Senator Ted Cruz, the Christianist darling, is a serial adulterer.1 Yes, Senator Cruz, the presidential wannabe that Glenn Beck seems to regard as the next Messiah, is accused of being a just another hypocritical horny dog.2

Finally, there’s former U.S. House Speaker J. Dennis Hastert – formerly number two in line for succession to the presidency – who has admitted to committing child abuse in the course of being sentenced for money laundering offenses associated with paying hush money. The sentencing judge called Hastert a serial sexual predator. Think about that: this former Republican Speaker of the House of Representatives of the United States is an admitted serial child molester. So the United States had the dubious services of three consecutive pious hypocrites as Speaker of the House, all Republicans: Newt Gingerich, a serial adulterer, who was succeeded by Bob Livingston, a serial adulterer, who was succeeded by Dennis Hastert, a serial child molester. All of them, not incidentally, voted to impeach President Bill Clinton for lying about his sexual infidelities.

So what WC wants to know is if this is, like, some kind of unwritten job requirement for Republicans?


  1. Not to be confused with former House Speaker John Boehner’s claim that Senator Cruz is actually Lucifer: “Lucifer in the flesh, I have Democrat friends and Republican friends. I get along with almost everyone, but I have never worked with a more miserable son of a bitch in my life.” WC understands that Satanists everywhere are offended by the claim. 
  2. There’s indirect evidence that it’s true. Senator Cruz has announced that if he is selected as the Republican Presidential nominee, Carly Fiorina, serial failure as a business person and political candidate, as his vice presidential nominee. Wow. Talk about deja vu. WC wonders if Senator Cruz consulted with Senator McCain in advance. Setting aside the delusional conduct, that kind of massively bad judgment wouldn’t be limited to picking a running mate. It could very well carry over to decisions about keeping your trousers buckled. 
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3 thoughts on “Are All These Christianists Pervs and Horny Dogs?

  1. It has been shown over time that, as you say, those who scream the loudest about their piety are often the least pious among us.

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