Crooks Aren’t Dumb? Meet Kamyar Jahanrakhshan

WC has a couple of emails from readers in response to his post claiming a lot of crooks are seriously dumb. These correspondents claim that the dishonest are smarter than average.

To which WC says, meet Kamyar Jahanrakhshan.

Kamyar Jahanrakhshan – we’ll call him “Andy,” one of his many aliases – is an Iranian and a naturalized American citizen. He lived in Canada for a while, until he was convicted of theft and obstruction of justice in British Columbia. He was running a credit card scam in British Columbia. At one point, he’d accumulated 113 criminal charges, including obstruction of justice and impersonating a police officer. He served 18 months, and then was deported back to the U.S. That “Undesirables” thing works both ways.  He had a prior 2011 conviction in Whatcom County in the state of Washington for theft. The conviction was vacated for reasons WC hasn’t been able to discover. Andy sued Whatcom County to try to recover his stolen goods. He lost. He appealed; he lost again. He petitioned the Washington Supreme Court. They declined to hear his case.

On arrival back in the U.S., Andy began demanding that news outlets take down stories involving his past legal adventures. He claimed they were “tarnishing his reputation and violating his privacy.” His typical pattern was to offer them a bribe to take down links to articles about him. When they didn’t, he threatened them with a denial of service attack (DDOS) on their web sites. When the threats didn’t work, he mounted a DDOS attack purchased on the dark web. And when that didn’t work, he threatened to call in bomb threats against them.

He thought he was clever, using an alias. But the alias was most of his name. And all of these threats came from the same email address. Which was registered to him on Google Mail. And, after all, who but Andy would care about the links?

Saying Andy isn’t the brightest bulb in the chandelier is an insult to burnout-out light bulbs everywhere.

He pulled the same series of stunts against, a site which supplies case law to the public; the Sydney, Australia Morning Herald,; the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation; and Bog only knows why he chased a newspaper in Sydney, Australia. And it wasn’t as if he was ever going to be let back in to Canada.

Andy left a digital trail that a blind man could follow. He even made such prodigious use of the DDOS kit he bought on the dark web that his dark web tech support person chewed him out. And may even have reported the idiot to the FBI.1

Andy was arrested on two counts of felony computer crimes.2 He is being held without bail.

Andy is only one dot at the far end of the intelligence distribution curve. WC has dozens of other examples. There are clever crooks, but, overwhelmingly, there are a lot more Andys than Einsteins.


  1. See p. 15, footnote 9 of the Affidavit in Support of Criminal Complaint
  2.  U.S. v. Jahanrakhshan, case number 3:16-mj-00636, in the U.S. District Court for the Northern District of Texas. 

2 thoughts on “Crooks Aren’t Dumb? Meet Kamyar Jahanrakhshan

  1. Not to be argumentative, but isn’t finding documented cases of idiots committing crimes somewhat irrelevant? Wouldn’t the clever ones be the ones who aren’t caught, hence leaving no trail for us to read about? Seems like the only way to get measure of the number of intelligent criminals would be to look at statistics on unsolved cases. Course that could also be due to police failures rather than criminal intelligence.

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